the flood pt. 4

Since I last wrote a blog post, I have been off in various parts of Thailand vacationing with my good friend Dana.  This was the only week of vacation that we would be able to share together during her five month stay in the country, so we took advantage of it despite the flooding.  We had a delightful time, trekking in the mountains of Chiang Mai and laying on the beaches of Krabi.

While I was gone, however, great masses of flood water moved into Rangsit, the area that I live.  There is at least a foot of standing water in Grapevine and the entire first floor of the building it is in.  Just across the way from Grapevine, the the first floor of the apartment building I live in also holds standing water.  I have no idea how deep the water is now or how much damage the buildings have sustained because the flood has made it impossible for me to return home.  I am praying that Grapevine and our apartments are not looted in our absence.  Some parts of Rangsit are under more than 2 meters of water.  It is so bad that they even had to close the evacuation center on Thammasat's campus that I was volunteering at just last week.  Those 4000 people have been moved again.

I am officially a refugee.

I am currently in Bangkok, staying in a cramped apartment above a church with some other missionaries who live here.  The water supply here is limited as sewage is starting to back up as the water from the north is seeping closer and closer to Bangkok.  The people of Bangkok are just now starting to stock up on food and water, leaving all the store shelves barren.  It has finally become a reality that Bangkok might be flooded.  To what severity, no one seems to know.  If the situation in Rangsit is anything similar to how it will play out here, I expect that the streets of Bangkok will be flooded beyond possible use in the coming days.  And of course, the first areas to flood will be the poorest areas.  The slums.

Tonight, I will attempt to get on a bus to Chiang Mai, a city in Northern Thailand that was only minimally affected by the floods.  My visa expires at the end of this week and I need to see a lawyer there who has been helping me get a work permit to stay in the country.  On top of all of the stress of the floods, my lawyers father passed away this week and I have no idea if she will be able to meet with me before my visa expires.  When I leave Bangkok this evening, I have no idea if the city will flood while I am gone.  And if it does, I have no idea when I will be able to return.  Fortunately, the Lord has provided me with a place to stay in Chiang Mai in the meantime with a friend of one of my campus ministers from Truman.

It is estimated that a third of the nation of Thailand has been affected, much of which is currently under water right now.  Yes, it is bad right now, but this will be hugely detrimental to the nation of Thailand once it is all over with.  

Will you please keep my lawyer (her name is Aom) and my visa situation in your prayers?  Please pray for the people of Thailand.  For the flood waters to recede.  For my team as they lie in wait in Bangkok, displaced from our homes with only a backpacks-worth of belongings.

the flood pt. 3

Well, after hearing all week that "the flood waters are coming soon," today was finally the day.  I, however, did not actually witness any of the flood, but only its residual effects at the evacuee center.  I spent my day sorting and folding donated clothes for distribution.  It was hot and sunny outside.  The puddles on the ground were not even as large as after a heavy rain.  In my very small little corner of Rangsit, all is safe and dry.  The only parts of Rangsit (my town) which are currently flooded are those that were flooded intentionally to prevent water from spreading elsewhere.  The plan worked.  Bangkok (where the money is) is saved... for now. 

This is the story that you will read online.  What the story is leaving out, however, is that those "intentionally flooded areas" are not just open rice fields, but they are neighborhoods.  Less than 10 kilometers (6 miles) from where I live.  People live in those places.  Or at least, they lived there until they were flooded as a sacrifice for Bangkok.  It is unjust and highly political. 

I am safe, Grapevine is safe, and Thammasat's campus is safe, but our community has been greatly affected by the floods.  This will not be over anytime soon.  The relief effort will continue for weeks.  Would you please remember the flood victims and the volunteers in your prayers?  And would you pray that the Thai government would treat each of its citizens with respect?

This photo was taken today by my co-worker Bank in a flooded slum neighborhood where he was helping to build a sandbag wall.  The wall was to keep water in this area, not to keep it out.

the flood pt. 2

I went back to the shelter on campus to volunteer today.  It was much like yesterday.  Hundreds of people lining up and passing things from one person to the next, from supply truck to storage room, to sorting to distribution.  We passed bags of water bottles, bags of rice, bags of clothes, bags of noodles, bags of hygiene products... bags and bags and bags.  The gym at Thammasat is being used as relief headquarters for our town, Rangsit.  My friend Aom and I stayed in the passing lines for more than 2 hours, and still more trucks were expected to show up.  It is awesome to see the community giving so much in this time of need.  But at the same time, having all of those bags pass through my hands shows me just how big this situation is, and how many people are/will be affected by it. 

The end of a passing line.  I tried not to be that farang (foreigner) who was just standing there taking pictures.

After that, Aom and I went to help sort donated clothes for distribution.  We sorted in a room with about 20 other people, and after 3 hours, it did not look like we even made a dent in the mountains of bags sitting in the hallway.

On our way from the passing lines to the clothes sorting room, we passed through the main gymnasium where many evacuees are finding shelter while their homes are flooded.  I had heard estimates of over 3000 people, but I did not imagine how many of those people were children.  It made me realize that these are not just "people," they are real families.  Who had real homes.  And now they are sleeping on a carpet-sized bamboo mat in a gym with 1000 other people, not knowing what they will return to.  Most people only had one or two large traveling bags with them-- their remaining possessions. 

The only two pictures I was brave enough to take as we were walking through the gym.  I think if I were them, I would not want people taking a million pictures either.  These two pictures do not even show half of the gym.

The sight of it all brought a lump to the back of my throat, stopping me in my tracks as the reality of my surroundings set in.  The air became thicker, the faces became real, and my wants and needs became less significant.

the flood

As I look out my window today, there is bright sunshine and the traffic moves swiftly by on the busy road below.  It is a deceiving scene.  There is a strange quietness and emptiness about the place....

All of the students are gone and as many people as possible have moved their cars, which usually line the busy street, to higher ground.  There is a wall of sandbags at the front of every building.

But the ground is dry.  This is not the case, however, for everywhere in the Pathum Thani province where I live.  Many low-lying areas, such as industrial areas and slum areas close to waterways, are already moderately flooded.  The flooding is not due to currently falling rain, but to rain that has been falling all season, and has amassed into a huge amount of water that is slowly flowing southward, breaking levees and dams along the way.  The town where I live is the last dam before Bangkok, so they are doing everything they can to make sure that it does not break.

In the absence of students on Thammasat's campus, new inhabitants have been bussed in:  evacuees, 3000+ people from provinces north of here whose homes are underwater.  Last night, I went to a gym that they have set up as a shelter to volunteer.  We formed long lines and passed bags of rice, bottles of water, and mattresses to be loaded onto trucks and taken to where the evacuees were being housed.

Snapshot from the middle of the water-passing line.  I found that Thai people are cheerful givers-- givers of both their resources and time.  Many of the students tried to keep the atmosphere light as they made games out of the work we were doing, spreading laughter in a serious time.

I will go back to the same gym later today.  Right now, the rest of my team members are helping to build a secondary sandbag dam in case the first one does break.

As for whether or not the floods will actually reach the extent that people have prepared for, I have no idea.  It is certainly hard to imagine with sunlight shining down and dry land to walk on.  But I think we are all praying for it not to be as bad as is expected.

the cross

It has been finals time around here, which means drastically less students coming to Grapevine.  Anticipating low attendance, we decided to do something a bit different for Souper Tuesday last week.  The Thai school year is not in session during Easter time, so it is not often that we get the opportunity to share the whole Passion story at once.  We chose to do the "stations of the cross."  Each staff member took one or two stories of the last week of Jesus' life to present to the students as we walked through campus to wind up at Grapevine for dinner.

Early in the afternoon, I went to campus and found a painted picnic table to sit at as I prepared for the talk.  The table had a picture of a golden castle on a cloud in the sky and the word "paradise" written in English above it.  Some of the other painted clouds were holding pots of gold, and there were little smiling Asian angels positioned around the castle.  I thought it was a fitting table to sit at for my purpose.  I wondered if the students who painted it had ever even heard the story we were going to tell that night.  Chances are, probably not.

At the first station, six students showed up.  We talked about the triumphal entry, and how Jesus was the fulfillment of Scripture.  The second station was the Lord's supper.  We did not partake in communion, as the students with us were not Christians, but we did share a snack to symbolize the meaningfulness of meal-sharing.  For this part, we coincidentally wound up sitting at the same "paradise" table I had been preparing at earlier that day.  Third, I took the students to a garden to speak to them about what was happening as Jesus prayed in Gethsemane. By this station, there were only four students.  At the end, we all picked up rocks to carry with us.

The fourth station was a long walk from the third, and there we discussed the  trial, beatings, and humiliation of Jesus.  It was moving for the staff members.  I know that I, at least, do not consider Jesus' suffering very often.  The Thai students were quiet.  The place where we stood together was right next to the main campus shrine-- a 30 foot sculpture of two spiraling dragons, with many gifts and flower wreathes below it.  From there we moved to a small foot bridge nearby, where we talked about the crucifixion.  This part was in Thai.  By this time, we were down to three students.

For the last station before we headed back, I led the remaining students to the steps in front of a dorm/food court in between campus and Grapevine.  Just down the steps from us was the shrine of the building-- an elephant goddess with many heads and arms, the smell of the incense burning drifted over to where we were sitting.  We talked about how Jesus is now ALIVE, and how this fact offers real hope and victory over death.

The students who were present at each of the various stations listened politely and seemed mildly interested in what we were saying.  We did not, by any means, expect some great crowd of converts by the end of the night.  Our goal was to tell the story in an intimate group.  That goal was accomplished.  We told the story.  And if anything, it was a powerful experience for the staff to remember the sacrifice of our Savior together.  And as for the students, I trust that God knows exactly what they heard, and he is more than capable of continuing to speak.

One of the most important lessons I have learned through doing ministry with Thai Buddhist students is that the Lord can do immeasurably more than we think or imagine with what we give him.  There is so much going on that we do not see.  God is using us so much more than we know.

in each moment

Just before I came to Thailand, I went to Globalscope Celebration-- a kind of conference for all of the international campus ministers who work for CMF.  At Celebration, someone (I dont remember who) said this:   

"The only thing that any of us has to do is choose what to do with the time given us."  

This seems simple enough, a common-sense type of statement.  My experience with this quote, though, is that the more time I spend with it, the more profound and meaningful it becomes.

What I do with my time-- what any of us does with our time-- matters deeply.   Each time I choose to humble myself before the Lord, my soul is filled more than I can feel.  Each time I choose sacrifice or obedience over the desire of my flesh, it strengthens my heart more than I will know.  Each time I choose to allow temptation to take over, it affects much more than I can see.  Each time I choose disobedience instead of trust, the ripples of separation are further reaching than I will understand.

This is good news and scary news at the same time.  God is more powerful than I imagine him to be, and he is able to use my attempts to serve him.  And he will use them not only for my good (because he loves me), but for the good of others also (because he loves them too).  The good news is, God will do the rest once I choose him.  The scary part is that... well, I have to make a choice.  I must make choices in light of the understanding that what I do day-to-day, moment-by-moment really does matter.  And for people like myself, who are not so good at being responsible for things that matter, a simple quote like this one turns into a provoking statement of what life is all about.

And what is life all about?...  Oh gosh.  A question I don't really know the answer to.  But I think it has a lot to do with being with God.  I mean, being with him truly, not just doing things for him or thinking about him, but "with" in the fully-engaged sense of the word.  When our lives are but a breath, time spent with the Lord is the only thing of eternal significance.  To be with him fully is a goal at which we will have never arrived in this life, but it is our goal and our hope nonetheless.

I realize that this all sounds kind of serious and gloomy, but the best part of the quote is the idea of grace embedded in it!  It does not say "all we have to do is choose what to do, and also sit around and worry about the choices we have already made or the wrong choices we will inevitably make in the future."  It is a statement that speaks very much to the now.  And in each moment of the now, God's grace is not only available to us, but sufficient for us. After all, life is lived in the present.  And being with God is also something that happens in the present.  Each new moment is one in which grace and power are available to us.  Each new moment is one that matters.

More than ever before, I am so aware of how what I do matters.  What I think, what I say, what I choose, what I teach and what I indulge in-- it all matters.  It has been a humbling lesson.  Because there is absolutely no way that I can accomplish any kind of self-awareness on my own.  I must ask for help in this, because I just cant do it on my own.  I need God's Spirit continually in a way I never realized I did before.

The way I see it, I have two jobs.  1- Humble myself.  2-Trust God to do the rest.  Would you pray that I would choose humility in each moment?  Would you pray that I would trust God to be with me in each moment?  Would you pray that even in failure (because I am good at the failing part of this), I would be encouraged by the Lord's moment-by-moment grace?